Thursday, August 2, 2007

the hits just keep on comin'

It has been a trying summer.

I thought the biggest issue would be the Muss without enough constructive activity. She really took to the whole school thing. No, it is not her, it is Boo. He is most certainly a 4-year-old boy testing every limitation and boundary that could possibly be placed around him. He has become obstinate, sassy and, well, just a plain little shit. Damn good thing he is cute otherwise he may not still be living.

Today he completely reverted to 2 years of age.

J. made the questionable decision to schedule Trooper a vet appointment while I was at work. Normally, we never do these type of things because taking all 3 kids to a vet's office for an hour turns into an eternity and also increases the urge to strangle children. But, no, J. has been super-stay-at-home-dad all summer and he can handle it.

Pardon me while I pick myself up off the floor where I have fallen from hysterical laughter. I have taken all 3 to the office of our family physician on occassion (when left no other choice) and it is not pretty. Not pretty AT ALL.

So, back to the vet. The kids are running around like little possessed demons with sparks flying off of their heads. They are then confined to an 8X8 room to wait for the vet. After what seemed like, yes, an eternity , but was really about 20 minutes, the vet comes in. Our Dear Trooper has been having some issues lately and J. wants to address them with the vet. Troop is pushing 8 and is a large breed of dog so this means he is a little long in the tooth thus he is having the sort of issues one would think an older dog would have. So while J. is talking to the vet, Boo and Kiki are under the table in the room coloring on the base of it. Yes, the assistants at the office gave my children crayons and didn't cover every surface in the building with paper. What were they thinking anyway? J. nips that in the bud, picks up a writhing, squealing Kiki and continues his discussion. They chat, everything is fine, then J. is mid-sentence and the vet calls out, "no, hey, don't do that" and J. turns to see Boo frantically scribbling all over the WALL.


That is right, the wall. Of course he apologized up and down and offered to clean it up, but they said they would take care of it. Maybe they know about the Magic Eraser.

So later, Boo is so busy frantically playing outside he forgets that he may need to stop and address his normal bodily functions once in awhile. Since he has forgotten this, he ends up peeing his pants. Seriously? The boy is 4 1/2?

This is all in addition to the usual crazed, frantic (are you seeing a pattern?) behavior that drives us to drink. Some of our favorites are the Wrapping Up In A Blanket And Rolling On The Floor While Frantically Laughing, the Running Circles Through The Living/Dining/Kitchen Areas While Frantically Laughing and the Poking My Sisters With Anything In The House I Can Find While Frantically Laughing. All good ones for sure.

Now I'm thinking he seems frantic a lot. Is this 4 or is this a bigger issue? We don't give him any caffeine. He rarely has chocolate and we keep all artificially-sugared items to a minimum. What is causing this? Is this 4 or is this a bigger issue? Am I breaking him in some way?

Sound like something to ask our family physician about next time I take all 3 of them in.

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